I was born in 1976 in Alabama. At the time I had one older brother. When I was about two my parents divorced. My brother (Rodney) and I spent our time bouncing back and forth between them. My dad remarried and eventually my mom did also so I ended up with more brothers and sisters. At this point, my mom and dad began to fight over Rodney and I.
We were living with my mom in Colorado. I remember seeing my dad just a few more times. My step dad was in the Air Force so when I was about eight we moved to Germany. I hardly spoke to my dad and didn't see him at all for almost ten years. Through all of this Rodney was always there. So it was a huge turning point for me when I was ten and Rodney got into trouble and went to live with my dad.
As a child, my behavior was always good but all I wanted was to be with Rodney. I thought, if I got into trouble I would be sent to live with my dad, too. I started to do bad in school but no one noticed or did anything about it. After all, I was a preteen, what should one expect?
In the eighth grade I started to hang with the "wrong" crowd. I also started dating that year. Deep down I thought these boys could give me what I needed, love, if I did what they wanted.
When I was almost fifteen we moved to New York. In my eyes I had lost everything (my friends and my boyfriend). The next year was very hard for me. I became very depressed. I started having anxiety attacks that looked like seizures. No one knew what was going on but things were getting bad. Meanwhile, I had gotten with a new crowd (no better than the first). So, by the time I was sixteen, I already had one pregnancy scare. My step dad had told me if I got pregnant, he would make me have an abortion.
In October of 1992, I met a guy (Jim) very different from anyone I knew. He was in control of his life, so happy with where he was and who he was. I had none of this. I was worried again that I was pregnant by my latest boyfriend, who broke up with me when I told him. Jim had something I wanted (happiness). I had gotten very good at acting happy but had no idea what it really meant.
Friday of the week we met, I found out I was pregnant so I had to tell Jim that I was pregnant with another man's child. He wanted to break up with me but the break didn't last. We belonged together. We had a lot of hard times. I knew I had to keep this child. In my mind, there was no other option. No one agreed with me. "What about your options?" they would say. "What options?" was all I could say. Well, my step dad came around and so did everyone else.
I had a healthy baby boy. As time went on, Jim began to see that my home life was pretty bad. We (my family) didn't know how to do anything but fight with each other. Jim and I were doing a lot of fighting of our own. One night we got on the subject of God. Having been raised Catholic, he believed there was a God. I didn't see how there could be. If there was a God and he loves us so much, why was my life so bad? We fought about it, then went on living the way we were with neither of us going to church.
When my son James was about one and a half, I decided I needed to know if there was really a God or not. So I called the only person I knew that seemed to know God, my son's grandmother on his father's side. I asked, "Would you take me to church with you?" She said she would, so I started to go to church with her but I still didn't know God, I just knew these people had something I wanted.
In December of 1995, Jim and I got married. Jim was in the Air Force so we had to move to Georgia. When we got to Georgia, I began to look for a church. I had no idea what the difference was between churches. I had gone to a denominal church as a child just long enough to get baptized but that was hollow so it didn't change anything. Jim was Catholic, so I said if you will go with me, I will go to a Catholic church. He didn't want to go. The church I went to in New York was non-denominational, so I decided that was what I needed. I couldn't find one, so for months I didn't go to church until one day in the laundry mat, I picked up a card that said, "Life got you down?….Go to church…..Church got you down?….Go to Faith Fellowship." It also said it was non-denominational and had a number to call. I started taking James and going but Jim wouldn't go. This upset me so I kept on asking him. He finally said he would try it one time.
Well, he kept going. Great! We were all in church. I started to feel God pull at me to truly repent and be baptized. I repented and was baptized in the name of the Father, Son and the Holy Ghost. That day Jim was also baptized. We felt we had done it all. Soon after that our pastor had to move. Since we were a small church, and met in his living room, we needed to find a new church.
We went to a church that he recommended called The Apostolic House of Prayer. When we walked into the church, which was the pastor's remodeled garage, there were people praying in tongues. I knew very little about this and thought it was not for me. We met a couple there who we invited to our house for a visit.
While talking, the subject got on to baptism. Jim and I said we were baptized. The man then asked if we were baptized in Jesus' name. The answer was no and does it matter? He showed us in our Bibles were the Apostles always baptized in the name of Jesus. When they left we were upset and confused. That was a Saturday. The next day, after church, we spoke to our pastor about it. He showed us the same scriptures and asked if we wanted to get baptized now. Jim said yes right away and they started getting ready. I was still running it all through my head. By the time they had changed, I realized that it is what God said to do and therefore I must do it. That day we were baptized in Jesus' name. I am convinced, that if I would have understood and accepted, I would have received the Holy Ghost that day. However, I didn't understand so I didn't speak. About a month later, someone explained it so I understood and was not afraid anymore. Soon after that, I received the Holy Ghost with the evidence of speaking with other tongues. I praise the Lord for His plan of salvation and continue to draw closer to Him. I want to learn more about how He wants me to live.
- Crystal Pendergast -